25 Days of Pride & Prejudice, Day 22: Oh, Joe…

So if you’ve been following along on Twitter or Facebook at all, you’ll have noticed a certain theme wherein someone tells me I simply MUST do a day about the Director’s Commentary and I have to reply back that I don’t have the director’s commentary, because I only have the movie on iTunes, not DVD.

This conversation has happened at least once a day for the last 22 days.

BUT!! A very enterprising fan found the transcripts for me! And I have to just say: Wow. This is a load of absolutely BONKERS information about the movie… Seriously, I’m more than a little worried for Joe Wright after reading this stuff.

So I thought today, I might left Joe speak for himself with some of the more… how shall we say… unique? quotes from his commentary.

But I thought it might also be fun to mix it up and play a little game with it: So for every quote, Joe is talking about a specific scene. There’ll be a list at the end for you to check your answers against. Don’t cheat!

1) “So there’s two suns. A bit cheeky, but I don’t think anyone really notices.”

2) “He’s all about sex, Mr Collins, really. Or, rather, sexual frustration.”

3) “I focused too much on the horse and not enough on the house, but I was a bit impressed by the horse at the time.”

4) “Basically I’d planned lots more shots through windows, which are all about veils of perception, um, the pride and prejudice. You’re seeing people through the windows of your own understanding. If that makes any sense.”

(No Joe, it doesn’t!)

5) I always think Mary looks a bit like a bat.”

6) A lot of gay Australians amongst the dancers there, um…”

7) “So I regret having to put that line in, but it’s important to tell the story, I suppose.”

8) “Ooh, not sure about this shot. Don’t know if I’ll be going quite so deeply into the world of CGI in the future.”

9) “I kept trying to find a way of getting the toilets into this [scene.] ‘Cause in our research we found out that if you were a lady…um, well, you would’ve spent the whole day eating or drinking diuretics to stop you going to the toilet. Then when you got to the [place], you just have to hold it in ’cause there wasn’t any plumbing or sanitation. Whereas the men could all dash off into the bushes.”

10) “God, it must’ve been boring living in those times. You just sat around.”


11) “Their relationship is based on pies.

In every scene, they’re eating.

And they have a very happy marriage in their shared admiration of the great English pie.

Or cheese.”

12) “Right now, Keira is running like a sprinter through that hallway.”

13) “I think that’s the most endearing line of Elizabeth’s throughout the film.”

14) “But he is too stupid to notice.”

15) “Paul, my editor, is very proud of the choreography of the soup spoons.”

16) “I also really like the ham there as well. Marriage as meat.”

17) “There’s a First World War, uh, monument underneath that Egyptian needle there. It was covered over by the design department.”

18) “And I like the way Mr. Collins curtsies and then realizes he’s curtsied and doesn’t know quite how to stand up again.”

19) “And she’s looking right in the lens there.

There’s actually no mirror at all.

And she’s looking through the flat,

directly at camera

which is her

looking at us.

We are her.”


20) “This is about sex, this place, as well.”

21) “It’s really a masterclass from Brenda Blethyn here.”

22) “I like the idea that those four swans there are the other sisters, that have been turned into swans. I think Lydia is probably the swan with her head in the water.”


I swear to god you guys, I just can’t with this movie sometimes 😂 Find your answers below, but first, don’t forget about our contest. Share any one of our 25 Days blogs on social media and tag Drunk Austen or #DrunkAusten to be entered to win! The winner will be announced on Christmas Day.

(Also I have to give mad credit to this blog, who did a five-part series on the director’s commentary transcript to this movie, and from whom I borrowed several screenshots and collages. Thank you!)

Day 1
Day 2
Day 3
Day 4
Day 5
Day 6
Day 7
Day 8
Day 9
Day 10
Day 11
Day 12
Day 13
Day 14
Day 15
Day 16 (Information about the contest)
Day 17
Day 18
Day 19
Day 20
Day 21
And, now that it’s over, here’s all the rest:
Day 23
Day 24
Day 25

-Admin R


1) Opening title card

2) Well, he says this while Mr. Collins first visits the Bennets, but I think we all know Mr. Collins is just bursting with raw, sexual energy throughout the film…


4) Opening sequence where Mrs. Bennet says “Netherfield Park is let at last!”

5) I mean, when does she not? I’ll never be able to unsee this.

6) At the Meryton Ball. I can only hope he meant “happy.”

7) Mr. Gardiner’s comment about joining Mr. Bennet to search for Lydia. I guess he thought it was too heavy-handed?

8) Inexplicably, the shot of the moon through Jane and Lizzy’s window after the Meryton Ball.

9) Died laughing at this one: He was talking about the Netherfield Ball!!! Can you imagine having toilets in the scene??

10) Basically every scene? But he meant specifically when the Bingleys and Darcy are having breakfast before all the Miss Bennets show up.

11) Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner, OBVY 😍🥧🧀❤️

12) The looooooong shot of everyone at Netherfield. I guess it was all done in one take. HIlariously funny to think of Keira sprinting in her ballgown behind some prop walls.

13) “Perhaps Mr. Collins has a cousin!”

14) When Mary looks longingly after Mr. Collins and his failed proposal to Lizzy.



17) See the answer to #3

18) When Mr. Collins finally gets to show off Lady Catherine at Rosings.

19) Honestly the way he says that makes it sound like a haiku…

20) Um, the MABLE GALLERY, of all things… I really can never watch this movie the same way again.


22) At the very end, in the US extended sequence:

10 thoughts on “25 Days of Pride & Prejudice, Day 22: Oh, Joe…

  1. Tbh, the marble gallery always made sense to me as a sexual thing because there are SO many naked marble butts that the camera focuses on. However I thought for a split second maybe it was the pig’s balls again. On an unrelated note, is “the pig’s balls’ the opposite of the bees knees?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Finally got back to reading your 25 days of P&P today and this is very funny. I’ve never heard/seen the director’s commentary either as I have it on iTunes too, though maybe I should get it now! As an Australian I am proud we had some gay dancers in th the movie!


  3. Yes, among the multiple times I’ve watched this movie (I do own the DVD), I’ve had the director’s commentary on. LOVED the concept of the 4 swans at Pemberley being Lizzy’s 4 sisters and the one with its head in the water representing Lydia!! So perfect!


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