Q: Why are you doing this?
A: Because I enjoy self-flagellation and I’m really hoping someone important sees this who can pay me to be ridiculous on a regular basis.
Q: Do you hate this movie?
A: No, I really don’t. There are parts I like to make fun of… many, many, MANY parts… but overall, this movie is what introduced me to Austen adaptions, as I was only 15 when it came out. So no, I don’t hate it. For all his faults, MacFadyen will always be my first Darcy. And I think a well-done roasting of something always starts from a place of love.
Q: What’s your opinion of Judi Dench’s Lady Catherine?
A: I think she is the only Lady Catherine worth noting. (Sorry, Barbara Leigh-Hunt.) How could anyone ever top Judi’s icy stares??
Q: No seriously, why are you doing this? Don’t you have better things to do?
A: Yes. Many. Your point is?
Q: I don’t know, I just feel like you could make better use of your time.
A: You and my mother, but that won’t change the fact that we’re on Day 21, I’m running out of ideas, and I’m literally talking to myself right now. Also that wasn’t a question.
Q: Fair point. Alright then, what’s your take on Keira Knightley?
A: She did the best she could with what she had, but what she had was a so-so script, a director better suited to being a cinematographer, and a god-awful wig with neck bangs.
Q: Can we use this space to plug the contest?
A: Absolutely!! What a great question, stranger!!! Don’t forget that if you publicly share any one of these #25DaysofPrideAndPrejudice posts, and either tag Drunk Austen or hashtag us with #DrunkAusten, you’ll be entered into the running for a grand prize that will be announced on Christmas Day, in our last blog!!!! Find more details on Day 16!!!!!
Q: My god that was far too many exclamation marks for one human being. Stop promoting your giveaway now and get back to the good shit. What’s your favorite scene?
A: I’m gonna be basic and say the cliff scene. It’s so beautiful but it makes me cackle every time because it’s SO. DRAMATIC. Why is Lizzy standing on a cliff? Why does she look like she’s about to cry? Who let her up there? Where were the park rangers? Shouldn’t there be a railing? I have so many questions, but I struggle internally with the instinct of wanting to pull her back toward safety, of wanting to just push her off the cliff entirely. It’s really a coin toss.
Q: What’s your least-favorite scene?
A: Ooh that’s tougher, but as much as I love it, I’m gonna have to go with the pig ballz. Why are they there? Why does Mrs. Bennet stare so longingly at them? Who is the Learned Pig of Norwich?? Why? Why??? WHY?????
Q: Whoa, are you ok?
A: I’ve watched the same movie for 21 days in a row, blogged about it every day, have a giant story due tomorrow, I’ve been up since midnight and my car’s in the shop because it won’t start. How do YOU think I’m doing?
Q: I think you need to take a breath.
A: THAT’S NOT A QUESTION.
Q: Jesus, ok… well, what’s been your favorite post so far?
A: *panting* uhhh… I quite liked how far I went down the rabbit hole with my No Kitty theory. I was going for broke and I think I well and truly got there. A lot of people thought I was deadly serious about the theory and I found it hilarious when they tried to poke holes in it. I just went bigger and crazier with my excuses and now I see how Trump gets away with so much. You can shout down just about anyone with wild, inexplicable theories!!
Also someone commented about how the blog sounded exactly like I’d written an argument for an English grad class or something and I was quite pleased with that. If any of my professors from CSU Chico are reading this, I want them to know that I similarly bullshitted pretty much every paper I ever turned in to them. I’M JUST THAT GOOD, YO. ✌🏻
Q: What’s been your biggest annoyance during this?
A: Other than trying to think of topics (which some of y’all reading this and a lot of my close friends know I’ve been talking non-stop about!) it has to be some of the comments I’ve gotten. Someone ACTUALLY got mad yesterday that I used “it’s” when I should have used “its.” Besides the fact that I write these on my phone and my autocorrect changes it without my consent, I need y’all to know I’m usually writing these at 1am the night before soooo… not a lot of editing going on. You’re lucky if the formatting is right and all the links work, buddy. Ain’t nobody got time for that copyediting shit! (For the record though, I DO know the difference between it’s and its.)
Q: What post got the most and least views?
A: Well Day 1 has got the most by far, with Day 8 and Day 3 not too far behind. As for least… idk, Day 5 and Day 12 seem to be lagging behind a bit. Which, tbh, I’m a bit mad about because I spent $5 on bringing you Day 12.
Q: What’s your biggest regret doing this? Other than, I assume, agreeing to do it in the first place?
A: Well now I’m regretting spending those $5, but actually, I regret not going bigger with it. I’m a bit sad it’s going to end in 4 days, though obviously, I’m also wildly excited about all the free time I’ll have back.
Q: Does that mean you’ll do another stunt like this?
A: Hey, maybe. I’m just dumb enough to forget how excruciating this was and do something stupid like watch Bride & Prejudice every week for a year or something. Would you finally love me then, strangers??????
Q: Hey I ask the sad and strange questions around here, buddy.
A: Sorry. Can I go now?
Q: No. Stop asking questions. What’s your favorite cocktail?
A: Anything sweet and fruity, that leaves me feeling a bit sick at the end of the night — exactly how I like all my ex-boyfriends.
Q: …Well on that note, now we’re done.
A: Great! Maybe now I can sleep without all of the night terrors. (I’ve haven’t yet figured out how to banish the deathly shadow of Caroline Bingley’s side-eye from haunting my waking dreams) So in the meantime while I get that sorted out, please make sure you check out the first 3 weeks here!
Day 16 (Information about the contest)
And, now that it’s over, here’s all the rest: